Ragnar, the piece of shit who perfectly personifies Minnesota Vikings fans and also that blight of a team’s mascot since 1994, is out.
If you’re unfamiliar with this fuck stain, go back and read this genius profile Steffen wrote on him back in 2008.
Here’s an excerpt that pretty much sums up Ragnar’s existence.
On top of it all, they play this stupid sound again and again and again during their home games to get their mouth-breathing fans pumped up. And who is bumbling around on the sidelines coaxing them on? None of the than the stupidest mascot in football, Ragnar.
Is Ragnar a real Viking, thawed from a glacier in the arctic? No. His real name is Joseph Jurantich. He’s originally from Milwaukee, so on top of being the official mascot of the Minnesota Vikings, he is also a traitor.
So the Queens opened their home slate on Sunday and guess what? No Ragnar.
Naturally, their sheep-fucking, mouth-breathing fanbase was irate. Because how can we know what to do at a football game without Ragnar!?!
Here’s a sample.
@Vikings where was Ragnar today?? I'd rather have him than cheerleaders! He's the soul of the team! #BringBackRagnar #vikings
— jensen jewel (@campari327) September 21, 2015
You see that?
Soul of the team.
It’s a pretty sad state of affairs when this dickwad is the soul of your team, but hey, Minnesota Vikings…
[fb_embed_post href=”https://www.facebook.com/443215990523/photos/a.10152143905930524.916713.443215990523/10156019130125524/?type=1&theater/” width=”480″/]
So yeah, Ragnar had to watch his shitty team play on television, which is what most people who don’t devote their lives to looking like a fucking viking do. We feel real bad for you, Ragnar.
Tears have been shed.
In reality, that Facebook post was just a cry for attention.
It got the idiot fanbase fired up and many demanded that the shittiest organization in all of sports explain themselves.
You know, because Ragnar insinuated he wanted to keep getting paid and getting into home games for free by being a goddam sideshow attraction. And how dare the big, bad Queens not let him!
Well, turns out, as you probably expected, this was about money.
Sources say Ragnar was asking for $20K per game from Vikings over next 10 yrs. That's $1.6M for 8 reg season home games.
— Jon Krawczynski (@JonKrawczynski) September 22, 2015
Hahahahahahahahaha!
RAGNAR WILL NOT BE UNDERVALUED!
Seriously, that shitdick wanted $20K a game for his mascoting services.
For once, we actually agree with something the Queens have done.
Fuck off and die, Ragnar!
Good fucking riddance!