Posts tagged Jay Cutler
You’re Hurting Jay Cutler’s Feelings!
Apr 11th
The Chicago Bears main mouth breather, Jay Cutler, is finally talking. Cutler hasn’t spoken publicly since the Bears lost to the Green Bay Packers in the NFC Championship game, while everyone with any sense questioned his toughness for not playing the second half of the game.
Lovie Smith: Still An Idiot
Mar 24th
After Chicago Bears coach Lovie Smith led his team to the NFC North title and NFC Championship game last season, I began to develop some respect for him. Since then, he’s done nothing but prove my initial feeling about him correct. He’s a complete idiot.
Would The Real Jay Cutler Please Stand Up?
Mar 6th
I’m not clever enough to write an entire article referencing Eminem’s popular song in witty sorts of ways, nor would I want any of you to think I’m a fan of his. So, the analogies cease here and onto the real question: does anyone else find it hilarious that Jay Cutler’s namesake is this meathead? [...]
Now Naked Guys Are Cursing Jay Cutler Before Getting Arrested
Mar 1st
The king of the mouth breathers and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler can’t catch a break.
I guess that’s what happens when you give up during the NFC Championship game, spend the second half standing around on the sidelines looking stupid and then don’t say peep while everyone and his brother is trashing you in the media during the offseason.
Get It Straight: Jay Cutler Is Awesome!
Feb 28th
Another day, another jerkoff defending Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. This time it’s Bears offensive coordinator Mike Martz. Martz is here to remind us Cutler is tough and tell us he’s going to be an elite quarterback. You know, the same Jay Cutler that decided not to play the second half of the NFC Championship [...]
Lovie Smith Gets His Extension, Talks Up Cutler
Feb 25th
The Chicago Bears have given coach Lovie Smith a two-year contract extension.
Smith, who was entering the final year of a four-year contract, made $5.5 million under his old deal, making him one of the highest-paid coaches in the NFL. Assuming he didn’t take a pay cut, Smith makes slightly more than Green Bay Packers coach Mike McCarthy, who recently signed an extension paying him an average of $5 million a year.
Quitler
Feb 24th
Remember when Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler quit on his team during the second half of the NFC Championship game against the Green Bay Packers because his vagina hurt?
In case you forgot about it, I thought now would be as good a time as any to remind you.
Vomit-Inducing News Of The Day: Jay Cutler Getting Engaged
Feb 12th
The more I think about it, the more this makes sense.
A no-talent quarterback is getting engaged to a no-talent reality star.
That’s right, mouth-breather extraordinaire and all-around vagina, Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is getting engaged.
Jay Cutler Is Weak And Everyone Knows It
Jan 24th
How does your starting quarterback not finish the NFC Championship game? Ask the Chicago Bears. Jay Cutler left the NFC Championship game in the third quarter with what turned out to be a sprained MCL. He then stood and watched the rest of the game from the sideline. You’d think they would have had to [...]
An Uprising Of Support From Broncos Country
Jan 20th
Face it. No one likes the Chicago Bears except for FIBs and maybe two people in Iowa. The point was once again reinforced when Steffen, the other mastermind behind this venerable institution known as Total Packers, asked one of our friends, and one of biggest Denver Broncos fans on the planet, to ask his brethren [...]
The Most Interesting Man In Chicago
Jan 6th
Ah, gotta be Chicago Bears quarterback and legendary mouth breather Jay Cutler, who helped usher the Green Bay Packers into the playoffs with much fanfare this past weekend by tossing two interceptions. Oh, I should have noted where he threw those two interceptions. Thanks to Mike for passing this on.
The Honeymoon Is Over… Again
Nov 5th
The honeymoon between quarterback Jay Cutler and the Chicago Bears… or at least Chicago Bears fans and the Chicago media, didn’t last long. The guy who was supposed to take the Bears to the promised land (preseason, 2009), quickly became the guy who was being booed off the field (regular season, 2009) on his way [...]
DeAngelo Hall Thinks Jay Cutler Is An Idiot, So Do We
Oct 26th
If any of you watched the turd laid by the Chicago Bears, particularly on offense, in their loss to the Washington Redskins, last Sunday, then you deserve an apology. Actually, you deserve an apology from the NFL for even putting crap like that on TV. Both teams are terrible offensively. Most of all, the guy [...]
This About Sums It Up
Sep 29th
The following video sums up what most of us were feeling as the Green Bay Packers fell to the Chicago Bears, Monday night. The agony and the ecstasy may be an appropriate title, although switching it around is probably more accurate. I can’t really see what was going on in the game, but my guess [...]
Jay Cutler Or Aaron Rodgers?
Sep 27th
We wouldn’t expect an unbiased answer from anyone here if they were asked to pick between Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. It’s a different case when you ask several NFL analysts, which the Chicago Sun Times Sean Jensen did. Out of 10 analysts polled, eight chose Rodgers. Two [...]
Predictons: Packers vs. Bears
Sep 27th
Steffen: It’s hard for me to say this, but I think Packer nation just has to accept it — the Chicago Bears are better than they were last year. They are a different, more confident team. They are playing faster on a defense that features a refurbished Brian Urlacher and the freakish abilities of Julius [...]
Remember When The Packers/Bears Rivalry Was Cool?
Sep 24th
This is a different NFL than the NFL of the 1960s or even the 1980s, for that matter. In those days, the Green Bay Packers and Chicago Bears generally disliked each other. Today, members of the two teams in the NFL’s most storied rivalry like to slobber all over each other. Case in point: the [...]
T.O. To Chicago?
May 26th
That has a nice ring to it, doesn’t it? Really, I could care less what the Chicago Bears do. They’re still going to be the third or fourth best team in the NFC North if they sign Jesus Christ himself, but… Word is, free agent receiver Terrell Owens was in Chicago this week for some [...]
Packers Lead King’s Power Rankings
May 17th
The Green Bay Packers lead Peter King’s first 2010 NFL power rankings, which were published in this morning’s Monday Morning Quarterback column. I’m less than excited about this for a couple of reasons. First, I think King is way off base about as much as he’s right about anything. Second, it’s fucking May and training [...]
Chicago Bears Settle For Mike Martz
Feb 1st
The spin machine is working overtime in Chicago where the Bears have hired former St. Louis Rams coach Mike Martz as their offensive coordinator. The disaster that is the Chicago Bears organization tells it like this: Martz was the Bears first choice all along and the only one offered the job. In reality, the Bears [...]