Posts tagged Chicago Bears

Jay Cutler Takes Care of Kids Like He Plays Football

Jay Cutler and son

Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is not very good at playing football and it turns out he’s not very good at taking care of his kids either. Surprising.

John Fox Now Gets to Lose to Packers Twice a Year

John Fox

The Chicago Bears have gone and gotten themselves a coach. He is Denver Broncos garbage John Fox, who will now get to lose to the Packers twice a year.

Meanwhile, Some Chicago Bears are Fighting on Twitter

Martellus Bennett

Chicago Bears Martellus Bennett and Kyle Long are fighting on Twitter because one of them unfollowed the other. These seems fairly emblematic, doesn’t it?

Ryan Pace will Now be Screwing up the Chicago Bears

Ryan Pace

We know you were wondering who’s going to be in charge of screwing up the Chicago Bears for the foreseeable future. The answer is new general manager Ryan Pace. We’ve been wowed again, Chicago!

The Other Jay Cutler Doesn’t Like Mondays

the other Jay Cutler

The other Jay Cutler, the bodybuilder Jay Cutler, doesn’t like Mondays very much. It turns out Chicago Bears fans berate him when Cutty! has a bad game. Poor sap.

Oh, What Could Have Been, Chicago

Phil Emery

The Chicago Bears can only think of what might have been. Thanks to former GM Phil Emery, the Bears were a dysfunctional mess from day one of his tenure.

Unfortunately, The Chicago Bears are Cleaning House

Chicago Bears coach Marc Trestman working the combine

The Chicago Bears canned general manager Phil Emery and coach Marc Trestman on Monday, which is probably bad news for the Green Bay Packers. Of course, so long as they keep their legendary QB, we’ll be fine.

Check Out This Handsome, Young Jay Cutler

young Jay Cutler

In honor of Jay Cutler returning to his rightful throne as the Chicago Bears leader and savior, we present you with some super-awesome high school Jay Cutler.

Anyone Have a Jay Cutler Jersey They Want to Get Rid Of?

Jay Cutler jersey to burn

It’s come to this in Chicago, where it really sucks to be a Chicago Bears fan.

The Glorious Season of Cutty! Has Ended

cut Cutler

The unthinkable has happened. The Chicago Bears have benched Jay Cutler, ending perhaps the most glorious run of quarterback play ever. The Season of Cutty! is over.

Chicago Bears Christmas Carols

Screen Shot 2014-12-17 at 2.31.29 PM

Here are the Chicago Bears Christmas carols you always wanted. They touch on some familiar themes. Themes like failure and sadness. ‘Tis the season.

That was the Bears Offensive Coordinator Slamming Jay Cutler

Cutty!

That was Chicago Bears offensive coordinator Aaron Kromer anonymously slamming QB Jay Cutler in the media. And the Bears just managed to get more dysfunctional. Cutty!

Oh, the Chicago Bears…

Sad Brandon Marshall

The Chicago Bears are a real sad sack right now. Their season is over for all intents and purposes and a lot of blame is being placed. Let’s revel in the misery!

Bears Fans Stabbed Because They Want to be Packers Fans

Chicago Bears fans

Chicago Bears fans being Chicago Bears fans. One group of Bears fans apparently stabbed two other fans because one said he wanted to be a Green Bay Packers fan. Not even making that up!

Willie Young is the Biggest Turkey

Willie Young

Willie Young is a defensive end for the Chicago Bears. Willie Young is also a moron. For his unoriginal sack dance after a non-sack, he’s our turkey of Thanksgiving.

Be Thankful for the Ultimate Jay Cutler Video

Jay Cutler and Marc Trestman

It’s Thanksgiving and as Green Bay Packers fans, we’re thankful for many things. Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is high on that list. Here’s the ultimate Cutler video.

Even the Sun-Times Has Lost Interest in the Chicago Bears

Chicago Bears headline

The Chicago Sun-Times — the city’s other newspaper — has just as much interest in the Chicago Bears as everyone else does. None. This headline proves it.

Total View: Packers 55, Bears 14

Jordy Nelson

One more time. With feeling! The Chicago Bears rolled into town and took a giant poop. Green Bay Packers 55, Chicago Bears 14. We break down the key plays.

Team-Killer Jay Cutler as the $100 Million Albatross

Jay Cutler extension

Jay Cutler was Jay Cutler in the Chicago Bears’ latest loss to the Green Bay Packers. He’s also what’s going to kill the Bears for the next decade. Team killer, coach killer, albatross.

Chicago Bears Fans Reacting Completely Reasonably

Jay Cutler and Marc Trestman

Chicago Bears fans did not handle their team’s latest loss to the Green Bay Packers well. They harassed the coach’s daughter, burned stuff and called for Jim McMahon.