Packers Add Guard, Linebacker, Defensive End In Sixth
Apr 30th
The Green Bay Packers traded their final fifth round selection to the San Francisco 49ers and landed pick No. 174 in the sixth round and a seventh-round pick (No. 231). Ted Thompson then turned around and traded that pick to the Miami Dolphins, along with the the seventh he just acquired, for the No. 179 [...]
The Book On Packers Fifth-Round Pick D.J. Williams
Apr 30th
With their first pick in the fifth round, the Green Bay Packers selected tight end D.J. Williams from Arkansas. Before you fly into a tizzy, the Packers were looking to add a tight end for two reasons. First, they don’t know what they have in Andrew Quarless, who they drafted in the fifth round last year. Second, Jermichael Finley is going to demand a lot of money in the near future and it’s possible the Packers won’t pay him.
The Book on Packers Fourth-Round Pick Davon House
Apr 30th
The Green Bay Packers selected cornerback Davon House from New Mexico State with their fourth-round pick (No. 131). Here’s the scouting report on House (6-2, 200) from NFL.com. House is a physical corner that excels in press coverage, and could develop into a starter in a Cover-2 scheme. He uses his big strong hands to [...]
Packers Trade Fourth-Round Pick To Denver
Apr 30th
The Green Bay Packers have traded their first fourth-round pick, No. 129 overall, and a seventh-round pick, No. 204 overall, to the Denver Broncos. In typical Ted Thompson fashion, the Packers added a fifth-round pick (No. 141) and a sixth-round pick (No. 186). The Broncos used the pick to select Julius Thomas, a tight end [...]
Rex Ryan’s Jets Totally Should Have Won Super Bowl XLV
Apr 30th
It’s a good thing the Green Bay Packers squared off against the Pittsburgh Steelers in Super Bowl XLV. Had they faced two-time AFC Championship game losers, the New York Jets, the Lombardi trophy would currently reside in New Jersey. No, I’m serious. Jets coach Rex Ryan said so. And you know he’s not a fat, blathering, idiot who just loves to hear himself talk.
The Book On Packers Third-Round Pick Alex Green
Apr 29th
With the No. 96 pick in the 2011 NFL Draft, the Green Bay Packers selected Hawaii running back Alex Green. Green (6-2, 220) rushed for 1,199 yards in 2010 and averaged a whopping 8.2 yards per carry, while scoring 18 touchdowns. He also caught 27 balls for 363 yards and a touchdown. Before you anoint [...]
The Book On Packers Second-Round Pick Randall Cobb
Apr 29th
With the No. 64 pick in the 2011 NFL Draft, the Green Bay Packers selected Kentucky wide receiver Randall Cobb. There’s a lot to like about Cobb, who was a first-team All-American in 2010, but to be succinct, the Packers haven’t had a player with his skill set in some time. Although he’s a tad [...]
Hooray! The Lockout Is Back On!
Apr 29th
Fuck the fucking fuck NFL owners. Apparently, they didn’t get the message when their commissioner was booed as he opened the NFL Draft last night. Of course, why would they care about anyone other than themselves? Once their lockout was ruled illegal and their request for a stay was denied by U.S. District Judge Susan Richard [...]
Apparently, It Was Time To Panic In Atlanta
Apr 29th
Yeah, the Atlanta Falcons and their nondescript, no-personality, never-won-a-playoff-game quarterback are a decent team. They still looked like a naked, drunken whore when the Green Bay Packers showed up and bent them over the kitchen table in the playoffs, though. After the Packers were done pounding away, the Falcons were sent home with a sore ass and the numbers 48-21 tattooed on their brains. So what do the Falcons do when the NFL Draft rolls around?
NFL Offseason Begins Today, For Real This Time
Apr 29th
The NFL took it’s sweet time, but the league is officially open for offseason business as usual today. U.S. District Judge Susan Richard Nelson denied the league’s request for a stay Wednesday. The NFL requested the action after Nelson’s decision to lift the lockout on Monday, a decision the league is appealing. Players around the [...]
The Book On Packers First-Round Pick Derek Sherrod
Apr 28th
Well, it took forever, but that’s the price you pay for being Super Bowl champions. With the No. 32 pick in the 2011 NFL Draft, the Green Bay Packers selected Mississippi State tackle Derek Sherrod. The Packers actually had multiple options with the pick — there were several pass-rushing outside linebackers available, most notably UCLA’s [...]
Fuck It! We’re Live Blogging The NFL Draft
Apr 28th
Yeah, although we have 20 better things we could be doing, we’re going to sit here and give you commentary, as only Total Packers can, on the first round of the 2011 NFL Draft. Check in, refresh, masturbate, leave comments or go blather about stuff in our forum. The latest info will be at the [...]
Big-Time Talent Could Fall To Packers
Apr 28th
The Green Bay Packers got lucky in the 2010 NFL Draft. The player they needed, Iowa tackle Bryan Bulaga, landed in their lap at No. 23 when most “experts” expected him to go higher. Bulaga didn’t necessarily slide down draft boards because of questions about his ability, character or health, as some highly-rated prospects do.
A Historical Look At No. 32
Apr 28th
The Green Bay Packers will select at No. 32 in the first round of tonight’s NFL Draft and as you would expect, there have been some hits and plenty of misses at that particular spot in recent years. Here’s a look at the players taken at No. 32 in the past 10 years and what [...]
NFL Open For Business, But Not Really
Apr 28th
Last evening, U.S. District Judge Susan Richard Nelson denied the NFL’s request for a stay, meaning her initial ruling ending the lockout remains in effect. The league had requested a stay while they appeal Nelson’s ruling, arguing that starting the league year and activities like free agency could damage the competitive balance of the NFL. Nelson [...]
Statistical Analysis Of Ted Thompson’s Drafts
Apr 28th
The only thing that’s certain when Ted Thompson is at the helm of the Green Bay Packers draft is uncertainty. Thompson is rarely predictable, but looking at the statistics, some patterns do emerge. For example, Thompson likes drafting wide receivers. In his six drafts as general manager, Thompson has chosen eight receivers, the most of [...]
Ayers Says You Can Take His 40 Time And Shove It
Apr 27th
You’ve probably heard the name of UCLA linebacker Akeem Ayers by now. We’ve talked about him as a possibility for the Green Bay Packers at No. 32. Well, Ayers would probably be gone well before the Packers choose in the first round of the NFL Draft if his 40 times were a little better. Ayers [...]
All Is Quiet In Green Bay
Apr 27th
A lot of people assumed players would start showing up at team facilities Tuesday morning after they were granted a temporary injunction against the NFL and their lockout on Monday. That didn’t play out in Green Bay. Exactly zero Green Bay Packers turned up at team headquarters. From the sound of it, the Packers wouldn’t [...]
Cutler, Cavallari Will One Day Produce No-Talent Offspring
Apr 26th
Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is the biggest mouth breather on the face of the planet. He’s also a quitter, but that’s not important here. Reality star Kristen Cavallari, of Laguna Beach “fame,” has no discernible talent and dumbs down every room she’s in. So really, it’s perfect that the pair, who’ve been dating since last fall, got engaged over the weekend.
Rodgers Shafted In Quarterback Rankings
Apr 26th
Predictable? Yes. Correct? Not even close. The New England Patriots’ Tom Brady finished first in ESPN’s quarterback power rankings. While it’s hard to argue with the reigning NFL MVP and a three-time Super Bowl champion taking the top spot, it’s pretty easy to argue with the other two guys who finished ahead of the Green Bay Packers’ Aaron Rodgers