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Minnesota Vikings

Adrian Peterson Football Camp, Now With Less Adrian Peterson!

Adrian Peterson

We’d expect nothing less from a member of the Minnesota Vikings. Running back Adrian Peterson is ditching his own football camp, which begins tomorrow, claiming he has to film a show for the NFL Network. We’d probably ignore this if the camp wasn’t called the Old Spice Adrian Peterson Football Camp and the NFL Network didn’t say Peterson isn’t filming his spot until July.

Vikings Probably Aren’t Going Anywhere

Metrodome

There’s been a lot of talk about the Minnesota Vikings moving, specifically to Los Angeles, if the team doesn’t get a new stadium, but that is beginning to look more and more unlikely. The deal the Vikings are trying to craft with the state for a new stadium in suburban Arden Hills is far from done, but it does appear a little closer.

Vikings Chirping For Plaxico Burress

Plaxico Burress

Two of the Minnesota Vikings main offensive weapons, running back Adrian Peterson and receiver Percy Harvin, are lobbying for the team to sign receiver Plaxico Burress, who was released from prison earlier this month. Burress hasn’t played football since 2008 after pleading guilty to gun charges and will be looking for a new home to resume his career when the lockout ends.

John Randle Still Hates Brett Favre

John Randle

Former Minnesota Vikings defensive tackle John Randle, who had a very public rivalry with quarterback Brett Favre when he was with the Green Bay Packers, still doesn’t think much of Favre. In fact, he recently compared Favre to a reality television show. “I’m done following him,” said Randle, who sacked Favre 13.5 times. “That went […]

Vikings’ Four Worst Moments Since 1987

Brett Favre

We love tales of Minnesota Vikings woe almost as much as we love the Green Bay Packers, so it’s literally impossible for us not to tell you about Pro Football Talk’s list of the team’s four worst moments since 1987, which is the last time there was a lockout. PFT previously looked at the Packers’ four worst moments. The Vikings’ list of failure and ineptitude is much longer, though.

Vikings Offense Now Perfectly Tailored For Idiots Running It

Joe Webb

We all know that collection of sheep fuckers, pedophiles, stalkers and Taser bait known as the Minnesota Vikings aren’t the smartest bunch. Oh, that’s right, they canned the pedophile. Nonetheless, the Vikings offense last season under coach Brad Childress and offensive coordinator Darrell Bevell was often too complex for the morons running it.

Rush Limbaugh Could Move Vikings To L.A.?

It’s only speculation at this point, but conservative talk show host Rush Limbaugh could be a viable candidate to buy the Minnesota Vikings. The catch is Limbaugh would probably relocate the team to Los Angeles. The Vikings are trying to get the state of Minnesota to cough up money for a new stadium and they haven’t had much luck yet.

Ray Edwards: Boxing Better Than Playing For Vikings

Ray Edwards

In yet another showing of just how much the Minnesota Vikings suck, defensive end Ray Edwards told the media this week he’d rather be a boxer than play for the team next season. Edwards made his professional boxing debut Friday night and thinks he has a better future in the ring than on the field. Really, we’re talking about the Minnesota Vikings here, so who could blame him.

Most Affected By Lockout: Minnesota Vikings

Christian Ponder

There isn’t much good news to come out of this blight of an offseason, also known as the 2011 NFL lockout, but if there’s a silver lining, it’s this: the Minnesota Vikings are likely to be most affected by it. And when we say affected, we mean negatively. The labor dispute will likely drag into late June, if not July.

Vikings Coach Accused Of Sexual Assault, Facing Restraining Order

Karl Dunbar

Even the coaching staff is getting in on the long-standing Minnesota Vikings tradition or being a completely idiotic douchebag. Defensive line coach Karl Dunbar may soon join the ranks of all-time shitbags like Randy Moss (hitting a police officer), Daunte Culpepper (The Loooooove Boat), Bryant McKinnie (aggravated battery, The Loooooove Boat), Onterrio Smith (The Whizzinator) and Everson Griffen (arrested twice in the same weekend, Tasered).

NFL Will Pay For Part Of Vikings Stadium

Metrodome

NFL commissioner Rodger Goodell has agreed to contribute money to the construction of a new Minnesota Vikings stadium after meeting with Gov. Mark Dayton, Tuesday. The amount the league will pitch in hasn’t been disclosed, but it should help ensure the Vikings will both get a new stadium and stay in the Minneapolis area.

Vikings Stadium Plans Down The Tube?

It was destined to fail, and it looks like opponents of the latest Vikings stadium proposal have found a way to fuck things up again. A new group, NoVikingsTax.com, says it’s discovered a loophole that would let voters decide whether a new stadium should be built with public money — no matter what the Legislature or Ramsey County do.

Minnesota Vikings Fans Are Worst In Pro Sports, Reason #5,081

Minnesota Vikings fan

I’m going to skip all the usual shots we like to take at Minnesota Vikings fans, today. Well, maybe not all of them. In case you haven’t heard, the Vikings want to move out of the shithole known as the Metrodome they currently play in. The team has two competing plans for a new stadium.

Now You Can Laugh At Minnesota Vikings Disastrous 2010 Season All Over Again

Brad Childress and Brett Favre

There’s not much we enjoy more around these parts than making fun of that joke of an organization known as the Minnesota Vikings. Their debacle of a 2010 season was fitting for so many reasons and frankly, it couldn’t have happened to a greater group of people. Thanks to Fly Over Entertainment, we’ll soon be able to relive the Vikings’ 2010 season in all its glory.

Vikings Want Ponder To Start Day One

Christian Ponder

It case you couldn’t hear the groans coming from the west, the Minnesota Vikings selected Florida State quarterback Christian Ponder with the No. 12 overall pick in the 2011 NFL Draft. Some might say the pick was a reach, and I’d be one of those people, but the Vikings were desperate for a young quarterback and quarterbacks were quickly disappearing at that point in the draft. Gone were Cam Newton (No. 1), Jake Locker (No. 8) and Blaine Gabbert (No. 10).

How To Douche Up An Already Douchey Event Even More

Favre Boston Marathon

They have a marathon in Boston at some point every year. I don’t pay attention. Running that far is for idiots and people who can’t afford rice. Oh! Look! I beat my personal best! Oh! Look! I can buy my starving Ethiopian family a bag of rice by pawning this medal! Oh! Look! I proved […]

McNabb Loves Minnesota Vikings, Minnesota Vikings Love McNabb

Donovan McNabb

The douchiest team in the NFL… no, sports history, the Minnesota Vikings need themselves a quarterback. Washington Redskins quarterback Donovan McNabb needs a new team after falling out of favor with coach Mike Shanahan. Well, you can put two and two together, as we did some time ago.

Vikings Stadium Debate Won’t Go Away

  Another new way to fund a Vikings stadium is revealed. As if we weren’t already sick of the back-and-forth over a new Vikings stadium, another new bill was introduced in the state Legislature on Friday to fund the plan and get it off the cutting room floor. The already controversial plan to raise as […]

Vikings Ben Leber Thinks Favre Could Come Back

Brett Favre

We haven’t speculated about Brett Favre coming out of retirement and for good reason. Favre maintained 2010 was his last season throughout the year and even went so far as to file his retirement papers with the league once the season is over. Every indication is Brett Favre is retired from football. Of course, this is Brett Favre we’re talking about. He’s come out of retirement three times already.

Carson Palmer Another Option For Vikings

Carson Palmer

Although several analysts have suggested Washington Redskins quarterback Donovan McNabb could be the guy who eventually winds up behind center for the Minnesota Vikings, the team has a lot of options. Peter King suggests the Cincinnati Bengals Carson Palmer is one of them. Palmer has said he won’t play for the Bengals again and who could blame him?