Jay Cutler
Cutler, Cavallari Will One Day Produce No-Talent Offspring
Apr 26th
Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is the biggest mouth breather on the face of the planet. He’s also a quitter, but that’s not important here. Reality star Kristen Cavallari, of Laguna Beach “fame,” has no discernible talent and dumbs down every room she’s in. So really, it’s perfect that the pair, who’ve been dating since last fall, got engaged over the weekend.
You’re Hurting Jay Cutler’s Feelings!
Apr 11th
The Chicago Bears main mouth breather, Jay Cutler, is finally talking. Cutler hasn’t spoken publicly since the Bears lost to the Green Bay Packers in the NFC Championship game, while everyone with any sense questioned his toughness for not playing the second half of the game.
Lovie Smith: Still An Idiot
Mar 24th
After Chicago Bears coach Lovie Smith led his team to the NFC North title and NFC Championship game last season, I began to develop some respect for him. Since then, he’s done nothing but prove my initial feeling about him correct. He’s a complete idiot.
Would The Real Jay Cutler Please Stand Up?
Mar 6th
I’m not clever enough to write an entire article referencing Eminem’s popular song in witty sorts of ways, nor would I want any of you to think I’m a fan of his. So, the analogies cease here and onto the real question: does anyone else find it hilarious that Jay Cutler’s namesake is this meathead? [...]
Now Naked Guys Are Cursing Jay Cutler Before Getting Arrested
Mar 1st
The king of the mouth breathers and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler can’t catch a break.
I guess that’s what happens when you give up during the NFC Championship game, spend the second half standing around on the sidelines looking stupid and then don’t say peep while everyone and his brother is trashing you in the media during the offseason.
Get It Straight: Jay Cutler Is Awesome!
Feb 28th
Another day, another jerkoff defending Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. This time it’s Bears offensive coordinator Mike Martz. Martz is here to remind us Cutler is tough and tell us he’s going to be an elite quarterback. You know, the same Jay Cutler that decided not to play the second half of the NFC Championship [...]
Quitler
Feb 24th
Remember when Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler quit on his team during the second half of the NFC Championship game against the Green Bay Packers because his vagina hurt?
In case you forgot about it, I thought now would be as good a time as any to remind you.
Vomit-Inducing News Of The Day: Jay Cutler Getting Engaged
Feb 12th
The more I think about it, the more this makes sense.
A no-talent quarterback is getting engaged to a no-talent reality star.
That’s right, mouth-breather extraordinaire and all-around vagina, Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler is getting engaged.
Jay Cutler Is Weak And Everyone Knows It
Jan 24th
How does your starting quarterback not finish the NFC Championship game? Ask the Chicago Bears. Jay Cutler left the NFC Championship game in the third quarter with what turned out to be a sprained MCL. He then stood and watched the rest of the game from the sideline. You’d think they would have had to [...]
The Most Interesting Man In Chicago
Jan 6th
Ah, gotta be Chicago Bears quarterback and legendary mouth breather Jay Cutler, who helped usher the Green Bay Packers into the playoffs with much fanfare this past weekend by tossing two interceptions. Oh, I should have noted where he threw those two interceptions. Thanks to Mike for passing this on.
The Honeymoon Is Over… Again
Nov 5th
The honeymoon between quarterback Jay Cutler and the Chicago Bears… or at least Chicago Bears fans and the Chicago media, didn’t last long. The guy who was supposed to take the Bears to the promised land (preseason, 2009), quickly became the guy who was being booed off the field (regular season, 2009) on his way [...]
DeAngelo Hall Thinks Jay Cutler Is An Idiot, So Do We
Oct 26th
If any of you watched the turd laid by the Chicago Bears, particularly on offense, in their loss to the Washington Redskins, last Sunday, then you deserve an apology. Actually, you deserve an apology from the NFL for even putting crap like that on TV. Both teams are terrible offensively. Most of all, the guy [...]
Jay Cutler Or Aaron Rodgers?
Sep 27th
We wouldn’t expect an unbiased answer from anyone here if they were asked to pick between Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgers and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler. It’s a different case when you ask several NFL analysts, which the Chicago Sun Times Sean Jensen did. Out of 10 analysts polled, eight chose Rodgers. Two [...]
Lowly Bears Apologize To Fans In Full-Page Ad
Jan 4th
Ah, how the mighty have fallen. Picked by some in the preseason to win the Super Bowl, the Chicago Bears instead struggled to a 7-9 record and failed to make the playoffs for the third season in a row. In response, the team took out a full-page ad in two of Chicago’s papers Monday apologizing [...]
Did Cutler Flip Off Chicago Fans?
Dec 29th
One of the more entertaining stories coming out of the Chicago Bears’ delightful OT victory over the slumping Minnesota Vikings involves Bears quarterback/mouth breather extraordinaire Jay Cutler. Pro Football Talk’s Mike Florio asks whether Cutler flipped off Chicago fans after they booed the Bears’ decision to take a knee with nine seconds left in regulation [...]
Jay Cutler = Jeff George
Dec 16th
According to NFL analyst and former Baltimore Ravens coach Brian Billick, Chicago Bears’ quarterback Jay Cutler is the new Jeff George. George is the former No. 1 overall draft pick who played for seven teams in his 14 NFL seasons. He had the strongest arm I’ve ever seen, but was severely lacking in the areas [...]
Oh Yeah, Packers Are Playing The Bears This Week
Dec 12th
In case you forgot, the Green Bay Packers are playing the Chicago Bears this week. That had kind of slipped my mind because… what’s that old song? Oh yeah, it’s this one. The Bears (5-7) are bad this season for a lot of reasons. Most noted is the fact quarterback Jay Culter leads the league [...]
Chicago Bears Fans Turning on Jay Cutler Already
Nov 24th
It’s true. Chicago Bears’ quarterback Jay Cutler hasn’t performed up to the lofty, Jesus-like expectations set out for him when he arrived from Denver. Sure, he leads the league in interceptions with 18 (vs. 15 touchdown passes). It’s true that Cutler interceptions put an end to any chance the Bears had in their last two [...]
Chicago: Where Quarterbacks Go To Die
Nov 19th
We all know what happens when the Green Bay Packers aren’t playing well. We all pile on coach Mike McCarthy (and rightfully so) and general manager Ted Thompson. Well, in Chicago they do it a little differently. When the Bears are playing poorly, they pile it on their former Messiah, quarterback Jay Cutler. Cutler has [...]
No, Dan Grossman, Father Doesn’t Know Best
Nov 18th
Chalk this one up to embarrassing things my pushy parents say. Except in this case, the “child” is 29-year-old former Chicago Bears quarterback Rex Grossman. And the parent is his dad, Dan, an ophthalmologist from Bloomington, Ind., who came out swinging Monday against his son’s former team. The elder Grossman essentially blamed the Bears‘ organization [...]
