Chicago Bears
Favre Wants To Play For Bears
Dec 5th
A source close to Brett Favre says he’s listen to the Chicago Bears want him to play. The Bears seem more likely to stick with the quarterbacks they have in house, though.
Kyle Orton May Be Chicago’s Answer
Nov 22nd
The Denver Broncos released quarterback Kyle Orton and he may be the answer to the question: who will replace the injured Jay Cutler in Chicago? Here’s why it makes sense and why it still might not happen.
Bears Anthony Adams Taunts Sick Kid
Nov 22nd
Chicago Bears defensive tackle Anthony Adams ran into a Green Bay Packers fan at a recent visit to a children’s hospital. What did he do? Take a look for yourself.
Cutler Out; Are Bears Done?
Nov 21st
The Chicago Bears will be without starting quarterback Jay Cutler for, potentially, the rest of the season with a broken thumb. Meanwhile, the Bears are fighting for a playoff spot. Does this mean their finished? We’re not so sure.
We’ve Found Douchiest Chicago Bears Fan Ever [Photos]
Nov 2nd
Glenn Timmerman has taken being a douchy Chicago Bears fan to a new level of douchiness. We’re not even kidding. This guy’s a real asshole. Take a look for yourself.
Terrell Owens In Chicago? Maybe…
Oct 27th
Michael Wilbon likes the idea of the Chicago Bears signing free agent receiver Terrell Owens. Here’s why it makes sense, why it doesn’t and how it could affect the NFC North.
The Bickering Has Started In Chicago
Oct 20th
Frustrations are starting to boil over in Chicago, where the Bears are solidly mediocre. Jay Cutler doesn’t like Mike Martz, the local media doesn’t like Cutler and Lance Briggs doesn’t like management. Implosion forthcoming?
Surprise! Bears GM Under Fire
Oct 14th
We’re not fans of the Chicago Bears, but we do know this — their general manager, Jerry Angelo, is one of the biggest buffoons in the league and we have no idea how he still has a job. Others are finally starting to wonder the same thing.
TiVo Time: Chicago Bears
Sep 28th
After slogging through the tape, we’re back with the breakdown of the Green Bay Packers win over the Chicago Bears. Here are all the important moments, what happened and why.
Green Bay Packers vs. Chicago Bears: Grades
Sep 27th
Grading out the Green Bay Packers 28-17 win over the Chicago Bears in week three, including game balls and marks for each of the Packers’ three units. Here’s who played well and who didn’t.
Packers vs. Bears: First Impressions
Sep 26th
First impressions of the Green Bay Packers 27-17 win over the Chicago Bears. Here’s why the Packers are 3-0, who looked good and what needs improvement.
Predictions: Packers vs. Bears
Sep 24th
Total Packers’ writers predict the outcome of the Green Bay Packers matchup with the Chicago Bears. Here’s how it will happen and why.
Packers vs. Bears Preview
Sep 24th
Here’s our preview of the Green Bay Packers and Chicago Bears week three game at Soldier Field, including game plan, key matchups and injury report.
The Greatest Green Bay Packers Player Of All Time Is…
Sep 23rd
After thousands of hours of research, Total Packers has selected the greatest Green Bay Packers player of all time. We used a very scientific formula, which was constructed over several years. Here is the result.
Jay Cutler’s Sore Vagina Doesn’t Know If Jay Cutler Can Make It
Sep 23rd
We know you’ll be astounded, but Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler already has a sore vagina. It isn’t expected to keep him out of Sunday’s contest with the Green Bay Packers, but it might make him sit out for the second half.
Chicago Bears: Brazen Or Stupid?
Aug 15th
The Chicago Bears thumbed their nose at the NFL and their new kickoff rules on Saturday by simply refusing to follow them.
Vote! Best Caption For Carimi Portable John Photo
Aug 13th
We asked our readers to caption a photo of Chicago Bears tackle Gabe Carimi exiting the portable john at Bears training camp. Now you can vote for the best caption. Have at it!
NFC North: Lions’ Big Loss, Bears Still Idiots, Busted In Minnesota
Aug 8th
You’ve got to love the NFC North. Outside of Green Bay, it’s populated with a bunch of idiots. The Chicago Bears are run by idiots. Minnesota Vikings players can’t stop getting arrested. In Detroit, they may not be stupid, but we’ll bet the hype died down a little bit today.
Please Help Us Caption This Photo
Aug 3rd
Here, we’ve got Chicago Bears tackle Gabe Carimi in an odd situation. Sure, he’s a Wisconsin boy, but he swore off the Green Bay Packers when he was chosen by the Chicago Bears. It looks like they’ve turned him into a mouth breather.
NFC North: Free Agents, New Starters And Other Nonsense
Aug 2nd
The three teams competing for second place in the NFC North have been working real hard to take home that trophy this offseason. Here are the latest developments from Chicago, Minnesota and Detroit.