Detroit Lions great Dan Orlovsky

And yes, when I say glory year I mean it in the singular. That’s because I’m talking about the year when the Detroit Lions did the improbable — not win a single goddam football contest.

The year was 2008, and the Lions accomplished a feat that was until then thought to be impossible. That is, play all 16 games in one NFL season and manage to suck so badly that they could not even get one lucky win.

On a side note, that Lions team closed out their record-setting run with a loss to a Green Bay Packers team that finished 6-10.

One of the quarterbacks for that team was none other than Dan Orlovsky. And of course the Lions signed him on Wednesday.

Do you know why? Because they are the Detroit Lions and that’s the Detroit Lions thing to do. Just like choking away the NFC North last season was the Lions thing to do. Just like drafting receivers in the first round of the NFL draft three times in three seasons is the Lions thing to do. Just like employing guys who stomp opposing players, eat their drugs during traffic stops and have total and complete breaks with reality is the Lions thing to do.

Have you ever heard the slogan The Detroit Lions Way?

No, you haven’t. And there’s good reason for that.

Unless you’re purposefully striving for total and complete ineptitude, no one would ever say “let’s do it the Detroit Lions way!”

So, Dan Orlovsky. He’s actually not that bad of a quarterback, but his signing pretty much sums up the Lions. They’re so laughable they’re not even fun to hate.

Here’s another great moment in Detroit Lions history.


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