Now that the fuckbags known as the Minnesota Vikings finally have a deal for a new stadium in place, it’s come to our attention that they’ll be looking to sell naming rights.

You know, because what business wouldn’t want to sponsor a second-to-none organization like the Minnesota Vikings? We’re sure the Vikings will have tons of upstanding businesses pounding on their door, but just in case they don’t, we’d like to offer our help.

Here are our suggestions for the new Vikings stadium name.

  • The Hormel Chili Dome — because Vikings fans love them some Hormel Chili!
  • The New Metrodome — now with fewer falling ceiling tiles!
  • Hamm’s Field — the Twin Cities’ finest brew, loved by thousands!
  • Minnesota Center Against Violence And Abuse Stadium — now the reminder not to beat your wife is right on the building!

We’d like a more comprehensive list we can send to the Vikings to help them out, so your suggestions are welcome. Please leave them in the comments.

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