Urlacher In Running For Hottest Girlfriend In Division [Photos]

2150 12

It was pretty much a two-horse race prior to this, with apologies to butterball Detroit Lions quarterback Matthew Stafford and his girlfriend Kelly Hall. The race for hottest girlfriend in the NFC North was between Green Bay Packers quarterback Aaron Rodgerswoman Destiny Newton and Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler‘s broad Kristin Cavallari.

The third entrant into the race is Bears linebacker Brian Urlacher, who’s dating former Playboy Playmate of the Year Jenny McCarthy. Is she as hot as she used to be? At 39, the answer is no, but she’s not bad.

And let’s be honest, she’s a pretty nice catch for a meathead like Urlacher.

The linebacker obviously has something for used up blonds. He previously dated Paris Hilton, which tells us something else. He obviously has something for chicks we’ve all seen naked, as well.

That reminds me of a story.

McCarthy is from Chicago. Both of her sisters, who are younger, were really good basketball players and both played collegiately for Illinois-Chicago, which is in the same league as UWGB. They were hot, so of course we went to see them play against GB in the league tournament one year.

Green Bay featured Cheri Nordgaard at the time, who was also pretty damn hot. The game was a total anomaly because there were three hot chicks playing basketball at one time, two of which looked a lot like Jenny McCarthy. Anyway, we were drunk and did our share of heckling, but the best part was the dude on the other side of the court with the sign that read, “I’ve seen your sister naked.”

Keep that in mind for this season’s Packers/Bears games. And now on to the judging of the broad.

Check below for the poll.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

12 Comments on "Urlacher In Running For Hottest Girlfriend In Division [Photos]"

  1. DD

    I love how this is the only website on the planet that keeps pretending Rodgers has a girlfriend and that he doesn’t swallow dudes’ cum while having his butted fucked.

      • peter

        I didn’t know your dad was still working the street… this recession has been a real bitch on all of us.

    • RR

      You say this like it even matters. Even if Rodgers was gayer than Elton John he’d still be the best QB in the league. And he’d also have the hottest fake girlfriend of all time. To go along with his super bowl ring and MVP award.

  2. RodgerDat

    Come on now, this is bitch is run DOWN. She’s in her 40’s, her vajeen probably hangs like a sleeve of wizard

  3. Hacksaw

    DD doesn’ t realize that gay is a protected class. He’s probably racist along with being prejudiced.

  4. Abe Frohman

    I thought she was hilarious in Baseketball when she sucked the chrome off a trailer hitch. She is hot with a great sense of humor. She’s probably too intellectual for Urlacher, though.

    I don’t care what any of the nay sayers above say – they’d be very happy if Jenny McCarthy was their wife or girlfriend.

  5. iltarion

    Seriously, this isn’t even close. Jenny McCarthy was a Playmate of the Year. I don’t give a crap about her being 39. She might even look better.

    I am more concerned with the years she spent with Jim Carrey. Who knows what crazy shit that guy is into.

  6. I knew Jenny McCarthy before she had breast implants when she worked at the 7-9-11 Food Mart at 49th and Archer in the Brighton Park neighborhood of Chicago so I’m going to warn her about Brian Urlacher who attacked me at the Fifty/50 sports bar worse than the mothers of his children and threatened to mutilate the genitals of his Afro-American children because Number 54 was having a psychotic episode on October 7th, 2011 from using the anabolic steroid Yohimbe.

Leave a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *