Eli Manning Is Now Rambo

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Ah, the New York Post — perhaps the final bastion of true journalism!

The back page of today’s Post features New York Giants quarterback Eli Manning as Rambo. They call him Rambeau, apparently because the Giants beat the Green Bay Packers in Lambeau Field the last time the two teams met in the playoffs.

So, you know, if you combine Lambeau and Rambo and then throw in a picture of Eli Manning you get Rambeau! That should be totally obvious!

Oh, shit. Actually, it’s Rambeau II because Eli drew first blood last time, kinda like the first Rambo movie was actually called First Blood. Anyway, now he’s back for more!

Hahahahaha! Totally fucking brilliant! I mean, dust off the Pulitzer for awesomeness right now! Start engraving the name of the asshole who came up with this!

Game over!

(Via The Urinal Sentinel)

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

32 Comments on "Eli Manning Is Now Rambo"

  1. GreenBastard

    I want to comment but what the fuck do you say to something this stupid. How many times are these assholes going to bring up the fact that they won here in 2007? That was five fuckin years ago!!! New Yorkers must really lead a shit pile of a life if they all get off by living vicuriously through fuckin Eli “Rambeau” Manning. I cant wait for the pack to put the beat down on this shitty team.

  2. Bears Fan

    Nobody is calling Aaron Rodgers Meadowlandsman or anything silly like that because he didn’t destroy anything on Dec 3rd except the hearts of the 3 practical Packers fans on earth. If you watched that game, you know why GB is DEAD LAST in total defense… and they give up wayyyy more yards at Lamblow than on the road. Take notice, suckas, that was your oh s#@t moment and most of you were too busy choking on cheddarwursts to realize GB should have lost that game… can’t wait for another shootout- NY is very very capable of getting this done.

    • nurseratchett

      yet another BITTER BEARS FAN!

      Regardless of how our season ends up this year, I have one guarantee….you will get your ass beat by the Packers for YEARS TO COME.

      Go troll your teams blogs, whine & cry with the rest of Chitcago.

  3. dennis eckersly

    New York Giants can kiss my ass. They suck smegma and they are going to get fucking crushed.

    But you have to admit the NY Post is pretty awesome, and this example only further illustrates that point.

  4. GiantsFan

    wow! the 3 previous packer fan posts couldn’t be bigger fools. 1st brings up the score of a 2010 outcome. the next wants to say how “new yorkers” basically bring up the game 5yrs ago, while a GB faithfull before him drums up the past. on top of that he dares to call the Giants a “shitty team”… hey dopey, you just squeezed that on out within final seconds. get ready for nasty pass rush from a healthy JPP, Tuck, and Osi. oh, and while youre at it “greenbastard”, checkout Eli’s stats. Sure they are not rodgers, but still damn good for a “shitty team”, you fool. i could go on with your ignorant comments but i grow bored with you. and “crefan”, with a retarded blast?? way to be classy you pathetic clown…………..the ny post will bast the giants when they suck, and they will have fun when things are going well.its a newspaper in an internet world and they are just trying to sell prints.clearly the above posters have enough whine to go with that cheese. on a serious note- thoughts and prayers go out to the Philbin family.

    • GreenBastard

      Nice “whine and cheese” blast giantsfan…nobody in wisconsin has ever heard that before. You are the first. We will stop bringing up last years drumming of your “shit team” when you guys stop bringing up the fact that favre gift wrapped you a win here in 2007 and that we only beat you by 3 this year and some how it was a moral victory for you guys. Nobody would even be talking about the giants d-line if JPP wouldnt have said the giants will 100% win, so you can drop that shit. Have fun watching the Knicks next weekend.

      • GiantsFan

        nope…. I will be watching the GMEN face off against the 9ers(who might give us more of a fight and not rely on bullshit ref calls). cya douche

  5. Dickleback

    Lol can’t wait for rodgers to just destroyyyyy w Jennings clifton and bulaga back. I honestly think the packers d will show up on Sunday too. Fuck the g men and they’re pussy o-line. It’s hard to have confidence in the D after so many shit performances this year, but I DO BELEIVE!

  6. Apeshit

    Bears fans trolling the packers site cuz their team is home dildoing their asses!!! Fuck the bears n fuck Eli!

  7. Ron Mexico

    Fuck you, Bears fan. From NFC championship game to 8-8, shameful shit. Go sit at the kids table w/ the Vikings.

    how our ass taste

  8. Buddymobile

    Anyone who slanders Lambeau field knows nothing about the history of this sport. Lambeau Field is the Mecca of NFL stadiums, and this dirty cocksucking piece of human refuse has the audacity to defile this great establishment. I thought these fucking illinois bastards were self proclaimed classy city types. Well you can throw that shit right out the window. You shitbag bears fan make viking fans look somewhat respectful.

  9. NJ Giants Fan

    I though Packers fans were classy. Judging by the comments on this fansite, you guys are no better than Eagles fans…perhaps worse. Go Giants! Beat the Packers by more than 3 pts this time…PLEASE!

  10. Buddymobile

    Hey NJ Giants fan (probably a Bears/ Viqueen fan) I didn’t know a guy had to be classy to watch football. I’m not classy, fuck that shit. I get work hard. I’m not one of those limp-dicks that sits at a desk and bullshits people while cheating on his wife with his secretary. I make an honest living repairing things for people. I don’t need some prick coming on a Packer site telling fans how to blog. Go watch golf if you want “classy”. Being classy is apparently more important than talking trash and watching a successful team. I do have a Packer tie. Does that make me classy NJ fan? I sure hope not because I’m not classy, I’m a crude son-of-bitch that has pride in his team.


  11. Apeshit

    Dear NY Giants Fan,

    Who the fuck do you think you fucking are? Fuck you, your sister, and your mama!


    A Classy Packerbacker

  12. Wipes with the Post

    I see a better comparison to Eli Sunday from “There Will Be Blood”. Similar brother issues, similar fate. And lets face it, Giants’ fans: Eli’s more likely to be confused with Paul Dano than motha fuckin sly stallone. Gimme a break.

    “Stop crying, you sniveling ass! Stop your nonsense. You’re just the afterbirth, Eli.”


  13. GiantsFan

    I know who we are. A team going to the NFC Championship game. I know who we are not…. a bunch of backwoods, toothless, inbred, loudmouth, Canadian wannabes! oh and you are a team that can whack your shriveled pudds and watch some real football on the old boobtube.

    discount double check my dick in yo mouth

  14. Fuck packers

    Guess the shity team got there green ass kicked. Looks like Rogers gets the retard award(Crefan).

  15. Bears Fan

    amazing how accurate my prediction was.
    Who knew? Oh yeah, everyone who is not delusional. Even vegas made this game even odds 2 hours before kickoff.

  16. NJ Giants Fan

    Dear Apeshit, why did you have to get my sister and mama involved in this discussion. Why did you say fuck my sister and fuck my mama? You are trash and so is your team. They let you down and probably the only honorable thing you can do right now is commit suicide, but I don’t think you’re man enough to do it.
    And for you, Buddymobile, at least you admit you’re not classsy. I did not go on this site to tell you how to blog, I was simply making a statement. I respect the fact you work hard for a living and you are a diehard fan. About your Packers tie, why don’t you tie it around your neck, connect it to the rafters and kick out the chair beneath you so you can die a slow death like your team. At least that will put you out of your miserable. Go ahead, do it. What you don’t have the balls to do it? I thought so. You’re all talk and no action. Just like your team. Have a day.

  17. NJ Giants Fan

    Btw, Apeshit and Buddymobile. I am not a Bears fan, nor do I follow the Vikings. Couldn’t care less about those teams. I am a true blue Giants fan. You can learn something from us. You can learn that we are true sportsmans and btw, you can’t fuck with us. Win or lose, we hold our heads up high and applaud the best effort of our team. Learn from us, become better people and do not say nasty things like “fuck you, your sister and your mama.” Those are terrible things to say and my beloved family should be kept out of it. Go blame that piece of shit Philbin kid who really fucked you guys up. Go piss on his grave. I am sure many of you diehard packers fans have already crapped on his headstone. That’s the real reason you guys dropped easy catches and Rodgers was out of sync. That POS kid put the curse of you. And you will have to live with that for the rest of your lives. Have a nice day and remember if you’re a real man, you will commit suicide as soon as possible and end your suffering. The world would be a better place with Buddymobile and Apeshit.

  18. jeff ircink

    @NJ Giants Fan – don’t bothering arguing with these people. not worth it. besides, it’s not nice to kick them when they’re down. it’s too early. they thought they’d beat up on the Giants and the tables were turned. i think the Pack is a better team…just not this past Sunday.

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