First Of All, Fuck The Lions

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Greg Jennings

Look, we’ve been fucking drunk for the past two days, so we’ll apologize for not writing about these dicks sooner.

We’ve been sitting here all week hearing about how the Green Bay Packers were going to be tested for the first time all season when they rolled into Detroit to play the Lions. The Lions are good this season. They have seven wins, a potent offense and one of the game’s best defensive players in Ndamukong Suh.

None of that shit made any difference on Thursday. The Green Bay Packers went in and played like the best team in the NFL, which they are, and dominated the upstart Detroit Lions from the get go in a showcase game. At the end, the Packers left with a 27-15 win.

The Lions are not quite ready for prime time. In addition to Matthew Stafford throwing three interceptions, Suh showed the Lions’ true colors by blatantly kicking Even Dietrich-Smith out of frustration and getting thrown out of the game. That was probably the most surprising development.

The Packers offense did their thing. Aaron Rodgers threw for 307 and two touchdowns. James Jones showed up with a 65-yard touchdown and 94 yards total and Greg Jennings bounced back from an off week by catching five balls for 74 yards and a touchdown. The Packers also shut down Megatron, Calvin Johnson, the Lions’ biggest weapon. Johnson caught only four balls for 49 yards.

In prime time, the Packers showed up. The Lions didn’t.

Too bad.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

23 Comments on "First Of All, Fuck The Lions"

  1. Ed Wood

    Lions are punk-ass pretenders. Can’t wait for them to come to Lambeau. Packers will “stomp” them good…

  2. I can’t believe that he hasn’t even APOLOGIZED FOR STOMPING ON ANOTHER PLAYER YET. I read his new statement today, still nothing. I’m a fan of the guy, but this has taken him down SEVERAL pegs in my book… Man up to what you did, dude. This is ridiculous.

  3. Madcity Packer Fan

    I am not a fan of this cheap and pathetic motherfuck! In my book the numbers do not mean shit when he has to resort to dirty play time and time again and then deny it! If he fucks with Rodgers in week 17 we could see this asshole get harsh punishment from the league as he should.

  4. fuck the pack

    The lions came out dominating the packers. If it wasn’t for the refs babying rodgers(the new tom brady) and the packers it would’ve been a different ball game. Mathews comes in and cleans up Stafford and no flag but kvb hits rodgers the same way and its “bam” 15 yds. You guys weren’t moving the ball at all until houston and delmas went out with injuries. Just about every decent pass made was against mcdonald who filled in for houston. You want to go talking about suh but look at woodson punching someone when he gets frustrated. What suh did was bullshit and he should be suspended but don’t act all high and mighty when u have just as nasty players on ur team.

    • iltarion

      dumbass, the Packers didn’t score on the drive with the roughing the passer penalty. In fact, on that play, the Packers had picked up 15 yards and a first down in Lion’s territory. Two BS penalties later it was back to 2nd and 10.

      Woodson punched a guy in the gut. Go ahead and compare Suh with Woodson and make yourself even more idiotic.

      It was 24-0 before the Lions scored a point. With all the guys injured on your defense, what was your offense’s excuse? The Packers were playing without either of their starters at middle LB, and yet, the Lions were essentially shut out until it didn’t matter anymore.

    • Harry Hood

      Someone shit in your mashed potatoes…..haha the Packers!

      You want to talk about penalties, there were about 5 miscalled plays for the lions in the 1st half, and 3 for the Packers in the 2nd half. So you still came ahead.

      Woodson is is bad as suh when Woodson is the victim and getting someone off of him, and suh is the bully acting like a bitch to someone on the ground.

      Your lions suck, go back in your hole.

  5. geopack

    How about some love for Evan. Our backup managed to bait their star into losing it and getting run. I mean really, could it have been sweeter? Those guys are talented, but quite dumb.

  6. nurseratchett

    Great game overall. I don’t know if Evan baited him, or if the Boy named Suh didn’t like the fact that Evan beat him on that play and others.


  7. Ryan

    Great game by the Pack. The score doesn’t show how dominating this game truly was.

    The Lions showed their true colors. Jim Schwartz embarrassed himself throughout the game arguing a penalty that was clearly interference. He continued to embarrass himself by allowing his team to continually play dirty. He pouted the whole time on the sidelines as did his defensive coordinator who looks like a zombie.

    Suh’s a punk. Schwartz is a punk. The Lions are overrated. The Packers are unstoppable. Enough said.

    Rest up Packers; get healthy and be ready to beat the Giants.

    Go Pack Go.

  8. PackerBob

    Fuck Jim Schwartz and his little whining bitch attitude. Why does he have to lose his shit every time his players get flagged for what was clearly a penalty.

    Also, Suh is dirty. Case closed. I don’t understand why people defend this guy. Okay, he’s talented. Okay, he’s a mean muthafucker. Would I want him on my team? HELL FUCK DAMN NO. Why would I want someone like him on my team when all he’s gonna do is cost my team the game.

  9. Hacksaw

    The Cowardly Lions need to go to Oz to get some courage, heart, and brains. Or maybe they should click their heels and go home.

  10. ay hombre

    Big props to Marshall Newhouse who had easily his finest performance of the year. Vandenbosch was invisible all day except for the one play when two bullshit penalties cost the Packers some yardage.

  11. Dave

    I agree about Schwartz it was so nice seeing the difference between him and McCarthy, Schwartz yelling his brains out spitting all over and looking a damn fool. alMcCarthy cool, composed, collected, even when he didn’t agree with something. That’s fine have a decent conversation about it. Beautiful.

    • Ryan

      Completely agree. Schwartz made a complete fool of himself, relentlessly arguing a call that was clearly correct. McCarthy remains cool and collected on the field and leads his team to an 11-0 record. McCarthy is sooooo underrated as a coach.

  12. Berryjs

    Ahhh HAAA! The Lions are the dip=shit thugs we always knew they were. What a bunch of Fucking morons. It doesn’t matter if Suh was baited or not, he showed that he is a mental midget.

    I would actually feel bad for Lion’s fans if the were not such cunts. They finally have a decent team and it will be another five years before they win the division. The Packers are working on a dynasty and surprise, surprise the Lions will have to play second fiddle.

    I can’t wait to go to work (for you Lions fans work is something that the rest of America does during the week so you can walk to your mailbox once a week and collect your unemployment check that we pay for) this week and here what the Lions fan in the office has to say about this shit show.

  13. DJ Marky Mark

    And to think all of the above ridiculing is coming from people who walk around with a triangular piece of foam in the shape of a chunk of cheese on their heads. Everyone is laughing at you not with you.

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