If you didn’t get the memo, the wedding registry for Chicago Bears quarterback Jay Cutler and pseudo-celebrity Kristin Cavallri has been posted, almost a full year in advance.
So what did we do?
Bought them a motherfuckin’ gravy boat, that’s what!
And not just any gravy boat, but the large fuckin’ gravy boat!
Added a nice little personalized message too. It took a lot for us not to call Cutler a mouth breather, but we didn’t think this was the correct occasion for such things.
After all, this is a celebration of two talentless people coming together in the sacred bonds of matrimony.
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