Cutler, Cavallari Will One Day Produce No-Talent Offspring

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Jay Cutler

Please do not procreate, Jay.

[intlink id=”13″ type=”category”]Chicago Bears[/intlink] quarterback [intlink id=”405″ type=”category”]Jay Cutler[/intlink] is the biggest mouth breather on the face of the planet. He’s also a quitter, but that’s not important here.

Reality star Kristen Cavallari, of Laguna Beach “fame,” has no discernible talent and dumbs down every room she’s in.

So really, it’s perfect that the pair, who’ve been dating since last fall, got engaged over the weekend. It is, however, unfortunate for the rest of humanity.

When two people with nothing to offer society get together, you’re guaranteed to get some real loser offspring and the Cutler/Cavallari beast will certainly make our world an even dumber place.

Just picture, an oafish mouth-breathing freak who starts every sentence with “like,” strives to get paid large sums of money for doing absolutely nothing and has the intelligence level of a hamster.

At this point, we can only hope Cutler is sterile.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

4 Comments on "Cutler, Cavallari Will One Day Produce No-Talent Offspring"

  1. MAC

    please never stop bashing jay cutler on this blog. It is a truly beautiful thing. His ignominious career is as shamelessly deplorable as his fat face. He needs to be thrown under the bus, both literally and figuratively

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