Fuck The Black Eyed Peas

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Black Eyed Peas

The punchline to a joke.

It’s come to my attention the Black Eyed Peas will be performing during the Super Bowl XLV halftime show, which makes me throw up in my mouth a little.

If there were ever a bigger group of sellouts, I’m not aware of them and I don’t use that term lightly.

You see, I used to think bands like Green Day and Metallica were sellouts. Hard-edged music brought them fame and notoriety and then they softened their sound just to hit a wider audience, was my ignorant line of thinking. I later realized they were pretty talented musicians who had evolved beyond their early roots (although Metallica hasn’t released anything worth a shit since the black album).

The Black Eyed Peas, on the other hand, are a joke.

They used to be one of my favorite hip-hop groups. After their first two albums, the Black Eyed Peas were the heir to the throne occupied by A Tribe Called Quest, in my mind.

They blended smooth rhythms, catchy, yet socially-conscious lyrics, smooth flows and made some great jams. ‘Joints & Jams’ from their 1998 debut, Behind the Front, and ‘Lil Lil’ from their 2000 sophomore release, Bridging the Gap, were personal favorites.

And then it all went to shit.

In 2003, the band released Elephunk, which unbeknownst to most of their fan base, would introduce a fourth member of the group.


My first, and correct, reaction to this new lineup was — why mess with something that’s worked so well up to this point?

I’ll tell you why. So they could make pop shit that appeals to the mindless masses, whose tastes consist of what they’re force fed on the radio and at the mall.

Goal: accomplished.

The Black Eyed Peas are bigger than ever, today.

Could they have achieved this sort of success with their original three members? Probably not. Tribe never achieved mass commercial success and Q-Tip has more talent in his pinky than all four of these yahoos put together.

While they were on their way to getting filthy rich, the Black Eyed Peas also succeeded in making some of the shittiest music the tasteful individual has ever heard.

They also completely ignore the music that brought them to the party. If you go to a Black Eyed Peas concert in hopes of hearing Joints & Jams, you’ll be disappointed. To these Black Eyed Peas, those first two albums no longer exist.

These guys aren’t just sellouts. They’re the definition of the word.

For that, I have no respect.

They may want to pretend they never made Behind the Front or Bridging the Gap, but they can fuck off.

I give you the Black Eyed Peas when they were real. You certainly won’t be seeing them at the Super Bowl.

About The Author

Monty McMahon is one of the founders of Total Packers. He is probably the most famous graduate of UW-Oshkosh next to Jim Gantner.

20 Comments on "Fuck The Black Eyed Peas"

  1. peter

    true story I saw them in 2000ish opening for no doubt they were killer then fergie came and they started to put out shitty music

  2. Boston

    i don’t really care about the black eyed peas one way or the other, but they “sold out” to make money. Nothing wrong with that, I applaud the decision. You can spend your life making niche music and getting nothing for it or release a couple popular albums and become multimillionaires. I’d sell out literally every time.

  3. Total waste of a post. Anyone who likes BEP are gay. 2 black dudes, a slut, and some long haired Indian or Mexican or whatever the fuck that misfit is.

  4. Dirty Sanchez

    Who gives a shit about their music. Are they Packer fans? If so, I don’t care what kind of shit they spew.

  5. Bogmon

    I think they are on a new frontier of musical adventures into Space Funk.. It takes true genius to “borrow” old classics and make them million dollar winners again…I mean…DO YOU KNOW how hard it is to sequence those funky beats….it’s like…mindboggling?

    (smell that…that’s sarcasm)

  6. phillthyphill

    Check out Verbal Kent- The Dagger, dudes lyrics are a little weak but production is sick, you may recognize a certain Packers announcer as the scratched hook, hence “The Dagger!”

  7. iltarion

    Metallica didn’t sell out. They simply stopped hating the world. It happens when you start making money. What do you think happened to Rage? Fuck you! Oh shit, I’m rich. Why am I angry all the time? … Or Ice T? Fuck the police! Oh shit, I’m rich. Copper, come over here and protect my shit, will ya?

    The best thing about the Peas was always their dancing. Eff all that. I have two words for them and the Tribe; it’s called The Pharcyde.

  8. Justin

    look at these 4 people. I wonder what they do for their community, Fergie looks pregnant and cracked out and thats being nice. This is why I’m glad I’ll never have kids so I never have to wonder if my spawn would emulate something this degrading to humans. They should all take a page out of Donald Driver’s book. Just sayin’

  9. Justin

    Seriously each one of them look high on some sort of hybrid mixture of LSD and PCP. If your head is shaped like that, you should leave your hair on it not just the top, lightbulb head.

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