Brett Favre is Fascinating!

Fascinating!

Minnesota Vikings quarterback Brett Favre is fascinating. One of the 10 most fascinating people of 2009. At least according to Barbara Walters.

Favre will appear on Walters’ annual 10 Most Fascinating People show on December 9, which made me wonder… well, first it made me gag, and then it made me wonder… what might she ask Lord Brett?

I thought I’d save Barbara a little time and list some questions for her. You know, the things every Green Bay Packers fan wants to know about someone so goddamned fascinating.

1. Brett, why are you such a douche?

2. Brett, why can’t you make up your fucking mind? Is that like a genetic disorder?

3. Brett, why do you have revenge fantasies similar to those of a 12-year-old boy? Aren’t you like 40-something now?

4. Brett, why did you think it was OK to crap all over your legacy by signing with the Vikings?

5. Brett, when you and Brad Childress go cruising for underage boys, who’s place to do you take them back to?

I jest, of course. I’m nothing but some form of jilted lover. But Brett Favre, fascinating?

Please.